Mungkin sebati

mungkin,

bila segala kotoran telah hilang,

dan yang tinggal, ialah,

jiwa yang bersih,

yang jernih,

yang suci,

kan bebas dari segala kealpaan,

kan dibuka segala kunci sangkar-sangkar penjara-penjara nasfu dan syaitan,

agar tiada lagi kehitaman dalam jiwa,

dan yang tinggal,

segala yang bersih,

segala yang jernih,

segala yang suci,

dan akan dirasakan ringan seperti kapas,

halus bagai sutera,

kewujudan yang sungguh sempurna daripada tanganNya,

dan akan bersebati dengan alam,

yang sudah sekian lama,

bersujud kepadaNya.

dan dia tak perlu melihat dunia,

kerana yang dilihatnya adalah langit-langitMu,

ingatannya hanyalah padaMu,

dan segalanya telah sebati dengan alam,

hingga tak dirasai lagi, kewujudannya,

hingga dia mengetahui, waktu azan-azanMu,

tanpa perlu menunggu orang lain dahulu,

hingga dia mengetahui, petanda-petandaMu,

tanpa perlu diingatkan orang lain,

hingga dia akur dan redha,

dengan setiap hela nafasnya,

padaMu, ketetapanMu,

dan pada saat itu,

dia telah bersebati

dengan alam,

dengan langit,

dengan galaksi-galaksi yang diwujudkanMu,

dan mungkin,

dialah hambaMu,

yang paling merendah diri,

terhadapMu.

for my grandmother....

When Allah s.w.t decides to give, not a hand on this earth can stop Him from giving,

When Allah s.w.t decides to take away something, not a hand on this earth can prevent Him
taking it away.






He took my grandmother away. She's gone.
Just a few months ago i took her hands and sat by her side.
Just 5 years ago, she smiled when she saw her granddaughters all growing up.
Just 10 years ago, she smiled when she knew her children are doing well on their own.

My grandmother gave birth to 10 children; 6 sons and 4 girls.
With her own bare hands, a kampung house, a small piece of land,
she and grandfather sown seeds upon seeds of vegetables, rice,
collected buckets and buckets of rubber milk,
upon the gasoline lamps, taught her children to study,
watched them graduate from universities one by one,
watched them sending photos of their own families,

and she sat there looking at the photographs every night,
looking at all those gone by years,

and now she's gone.

she taught my mother to be strong,
therefore she is stronger than anyone i've known,

knowing Allah s.w.t has chosen this way,
there's nothing i can do but to bury this pain.

and when i know i can't give her prayers of al-fatihah,
my heart is wounded,

and the only thing i can do is to pray that Allah s.w.t will lighten her burden in the afterlife,
ease her journey, and save her from any more sufferings.

Inna lillahi wa inna ilaihi raji'un
To Allah we belong, and to Him shall we be returned