there came tears in my solat

there came tears in my solat,
sobs between sobs that i can't stop,
as i realized how far i am from You,
still so far though i've changed so much.

there came tears in my solat tonight,
as i wonder where do i look for You,
when no more voices came from my friends,
when You do not speak with a voice audible to us,
how do i seek Your companion,
when i bow down to You, do You see me?

along with these tears,

along with these tears i surrender myself,
forgive my sins of the past, present and to come,
forgive my weakness in seeking for You,
why o'Lord, am i filled with syaitan?

tears came into my solat, tonight, dear Lord,

in my loneliness,
in my awkwardness and foreignness,
in being Your servant, Your creation.